The Thirteen Rules

By

Fight Club
*This is an archived article from my former blog*

I was tempted to edit this post and call it The Ten Commandments, but that would be too controversial!

I was reading through some of Tom Marshalls previous posts on his blog, and came across these points that made me chuckle. I thought I would pass them on to others by stealing them – I hope you dont mind Mr Marshall!?
The Italics is my view/interpretation.

1. Never take life too seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
If you cant enjoy your own foul-ups, how can you laugh at others?
2. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Now I take my health (reasonably) seriously, as I don’t want to be in pain as I get older. However, there is a limit – diets, exercising to the point of exhaustion/addiction, eating/drinking vile things. There is a limit guys!
3. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
Just do what you think is right, even if people say otherwise. Think about it, listen to others, weigh it up and finally implement it! And don’t take it personally – Unless it is!
4. In the 60s people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
The world is what it is. We make it the way it is So deal with it!
5. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
Ha ha.
Oi!
6. A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
If the sun shone every day, nobody would appreciate a sunny day. And that is something to appreciate.
7. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.
There is always someone stronger than you. Just be aware of them, and if necessary, RUN!
8. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
I wonder how much taller I’d be at 5.00pm if it wasn’t for gravity!
9. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?
The alternative being free death!?
10. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
Idiots are ingenious.
11. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
And the remaining 10% of choice? Ah, they’ll be the gamblers!
12. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
Don’t even get me started on the Governments Benefit Scheme. It seems that people are rewarded (with free money) for (in societies view) under-achieving. And those who achieve great success get taxed more to make those under-achievers better off. Now I know that not all benefit claimers are there by choice, and many do attempt to sort themselves out. But seriously, rewarding the poor by stealing from the rich – its all a bit Robin Hood-esque!
13. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Anyone can make a great-looking CV. Few people can master the art of the interview.